Tuesday, January 4, 2011

Tahun Baru!

Hello peeps

Welcome 2011 and goodbye 2010, and as they say,life must go on. So, after a long time of not blogging,I decided to post something,not personal stuff or events or anything,but something that aku terjumpa while googling out stuff and found an interesting post by this blogger.So since it's the new year and stuff, this will be a post about advice and perspectives,and hopefully we can get something out of it yeah.

Here goes.

Lesson 1:

A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing up her shower, when the doorbell rings. The wife quickly wraps herself in a towel and runs downstairs. When she opens the door, there stands Bob, the next-door neighbor. Before she says a word, Bob says, 'I'll give you $800 to drop that towel, ' After thinking for a moment, the woman drops her towel and stands naked in front of Bob After a few seconds, Bob hands her $800 and leaves. The woman wraps back up in the towel and goes back upstairs. When she gets to the bathroom, her husband asks, 'Who was that?' 'It was Bob the next door neighbor,' she replies.. 'Great,' the husband says, 'did he say anything about the $800 he owes me?'

Moral of the story: If you share critical information pertaining to credit and risk withyour shareholders in time, you may be in a position to preventavoidable exposure.

Lesson 2:

A priest offered a Nun a lift. She got in and crossed her legs,forcing her gown to reveal a leg. The priest nearly had an accident. After controlling the car, he stealthily slid his hand up her leg. The nun said, 'Father, remember Psalm 129?' The priest removed his hand. But, changing gears, he let his hand slide up her leg again. The nun once again said, 'Father, remember Psalm 129?' The priest apologized 'Sorry sister but the flesh is weak.' Arriving at the convent, the nun sighed heavily and went on her way. On his arrival at the church, the priest rushed to look up Psalm 129 It said, 'Go forth and seek, further up, you will find glory.'

Moral of the story: If you are not well informed in your job, you might miss a great opportunity.

Lesson 3:

A sales rep, an administration clerk, and the manager are walking to lunch when they find an antique oil lamp. They rub it and a Genie comes out. The Genie says, 'I'll give each of you just one wish.'' Me first! Me first!' says the admin clerk. 'I want to be in theBahamas, driving a speedboat, without a care in the world.' Puff! She's gone. 'Me next! Me next!' says the sales rep. 'I want to be in Hawaii , relaxing on the beach with my personal masseuse, an endless supply of Pina Coladas and the love of my life.' Puff! He's gone. 'OK, you're up,' the Genie says to the manager. The manager says, 'I want those two back in the office after lunch.'

Moral of the story: Always let your boss have the first say.

Lesson 4

An eagle was sitting on a tree resting, doing nothing. A small rabbitsaw the eagle and asked him, 'Can I also sit like you and do nothing?' The eagle answered: 'Sure , why not..' So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the eagle and rested. All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it.

Moral of the story: To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very highup.

Lesson 5

A turkey was chatting with a bull. 'I would love to be able to get tothe top of that tree,' sighed the turkey, 'but I haven't got the energy.' 'Well, why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?' replied the bull. They're packed with nutrients.' The turkey pecked at a lump of dung, and found it actually gave him enough strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree. The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch. Finally after a fourth night, the turkey was proudly perched at the top of the tree. He was promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot him out of the tree.

Moral of the story: BullShit might get you to the top, but it won't keep you there..

Lesson 6

A little bird was flying south for the Winter. It was so cold the birdfroze and fell to the ground into a large field. While he was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on him. As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, he began to realize how warm he was. The dung was actually thawing him out! He laythere all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy. A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate. Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him.

Morals of the story:

(1) Not everyone who shits on you is your enemy.

(2) Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend.

(3) And when you're in deep shit, it's best to keep your mouth shut!

That's all peeps,thanks for reading,and sorry if u find any of it offensive, since my intention was for the best.Happy New Year people!

Sunday, July 11, 2010

OLD FRIENDS,OLD MEMORIES

BAPAK RAMAI ORANG KAT CASA SUBANG

dan antara ramai2 orang yg dicampak ke sini, ada la one good friend bernama eddy yg baru sahaja mendapat tawaran jpa di Taylors hari Sabtu lepas. Dia dapat ICPU untuk pegi ke Canada

Berikut merupakan conversation selepas aku habis IELTS test dan die abes daftar

ED: dude, ko tingkat berapa kat casa
Aku: 17 la? asal?
ED:sama la,sambil menunjukkan fail with my house number on it, A-17-05
Aku: WHAT? THat's my Room DOwh! (sambil menumbuk bahu die)
ED: HAHAHAHA!!!!

Kedatangan kembali eddy ade banyak hikmah.Akhirnya ada la gak budak ni yg dapat teman dan galakkan aku belajar kat sini.Dugaan sumpah byk, aku dah cam nak kalah dah. So bertambah menarik la casa subang

Buat yg x tau sapa itu eddy, die member baik aku, yg debate skali ngan aku masa kat SASER dulu.GOOD TIMES beb..

Dan kembalinya die ke sini membuatkan aku teringat satu cerita yg agak lawak apabila dipikirkan balik.Meh sini aku story

Tempat: SASER masa: Lepas semayang ZOHOR

aku pun masuk balik ke kelas untuk meneruskan prep petang seperti biasa selepas makan dan solat di waktu tengahhari. Tetapi, hari ini bukan hari biasa kerana ade kejutan menunggu aku di kelas. Kerana hari ini di atas meja aku ada sekeping post it berwarna kuning.Jeng3...

"Afiq,if u know whose handwriting is this,meet me ASAP,ade berita penting, cepat! "

Aku tau itu nota dari eddy.Sebab:

1) tulisan die mmg distinguishable,agak buruk gak
2) die pakai post it,kertas favourite die, sampai buat nota sejarah pon pakai post it. Org len xkan tinggalkan nota,dorg hanya akan bg mesej lisan kat dak2 Omega yg ade dalam kelas tu

So, selepas membaca nota itu,aku pun start panic.Siot tol,nota tergantung,seribu satu persoalan datang masuk otak.

Ade org mati ke?
Ridhuan eksiden?
Kak Fie nak dtg n bagi news about a gle2 dbate competition??
Madam Lim (debate teacher) is involved in an accident (god forbid)??
People i know is in trouble?
Am I in trouble for some random shit I do and I might have forgotten about it and now another person is caught and i have to be a witness and shit?
Did EDDY just discovered a hidden treasure that is forgotten by SDAR?

Banyak la bende dan persoalan timbul.I was incapacitated and langsung x bole dengar ape cikgu Add Math ngah ajar kat depan.Memang psycho abes ar.Aku kuar tandas 2 kali dan lalu depan kelas EDDY iaitu zeta walaupun tu jalan jauh pergi toilet.Bukannye budak tu nak keluar dari kelas dier,buat tak tau lak.So aku pun tunggu for about an agonising 2 hours sampai abes prep.Habis prep,aku tunggu dalam kelas dalam setengah jam sebab mana la tau dak ni datang en. Last2 aku malas, aku pon jalan balek ke dorm Jebat.Dan, on the way, lalu la sebelah bilik komputer di mana segerombolan org dah beratur untuk main game Counter Strike secara haram atau mengupdate status facebook dengan countdown hari ke SPM dan bende2 depresing yg lain.Dan, secara kebetulan, ade la budak bertuah bernama Eddy sedang beratur di tempat yg sama.

So aku pon tanya la

Me "Dude, is everything alright?? Ape jadi dowh"
HIM"Owh,this, nothing man, I wanna go do facebook" (pointing at lab comp)
Me "No,no,the note u left me on the table? What's up,ade org sakit ke? " (slightly agitated)
HIM "Owh thatttt noteeee,,,i remember, nah, i just want to tell u KAK FIE POSTED OUR PICS ON FACEBOOK DAH..." (With a happy face)
"F!@#K! ALL THIS FOR PICS???WHAT???? @!@$$#@(more curses)

I was so pissed I got the hell out of there.Sumpah macam bodoh!

HAHA,so begitulah cerita die,kengkadang bende simple pon bole di besar2 kan apabila miscommunication berlaku. So moral dier, jgn la dramatic sgt ye tuan2 dan puan.

BTW,the pics were awesome,and, we played football an hour later and everything was cool.HAHA,good times,good times... :D


Monday, May 24, 2010

In the quest of PERLIS perspective

ARAU OPEN 2010

My 1st English post yo.Here goes

In my quest to change my old self which always says no, ill think about it, or even nanti la, din and me came up with a cool motto

"We are the unintentional traveller" or "Takyah pikir2, pegi je"

And staying true to the motto, when Osho told me about a debate competition in Arau,Perlis.I just agreed and to the hell with details.Go first,ask question later.

Here are the details:

-Australs style (no point of information)
-30 teams participating (16 from UITM alone =_=)
-all of us are self funded, but THANKS Taylors for the T-SHIRT yeaH..

The expedition:

Osho-as Supreme Dictator also as 3rd Speaker
Afiq-as the Mind Tormentor also as 1st Speaker
Joshua- the Purist also as 2nd Speaker
Hillary-victim of Mindfuck(also known as blurness) and 1st adjudicator (male)
Raihan-Protector of Mr.Mac and 2nd adjudicator (female)

Here are the bit by bit of awesome events

Day 1 (rabu malam)

-Ayah Osho,Mr Manikkam picked us up at Casa,accompanied by Raihan saying to Osho how cute his dad looks.Haha (this is followed by the bus driver,some random people)
-Got on the bus at exactly 11 pm
-It turns out that the highway to north has no highway lights, and it is bapak menakutkan especially as the bus driver is kinda driving following the backlights of other cars.=_=
-Saw a girl who looks like Huda from Petrosains(which later turned out to be her) but the dim lighting and Osho's math calculation which is[ P(afiq on the bus to perlis) X P(Huda on the bus to Perlis)] is extremely little and which made me doubt it. Woke up at 3am in a middle of nowhere at a R and R for toilet break and almost kena tinggal bas.

Day 2 (thursday)
-Arrived at Kangar.Awesome folks and food.Murah beb. :D
-Registration at UITM Arau
-Team name is Tadpole (Taylor's Debating Promiscuous Old ladies Entourage or Taylor's Debating Prolificly Obscure Leader Entourage)
-More sleeping and slight worrying as I have only been 1st speeker once before
-Awesome briefing by Mr Omar or Rafiq's Dad. Best debate briefing ever.Funny stuff.

Day 3 ( Friday)

-First motion released
-This house would (THW) force priest to marry or leave the holy order
-Tadpole (GOV) vs Uni Malaysia Pahang (OPP)
-Lose.Bummer.Margin is (-0.5)
2nd Round

THW take guns away from Malaysian Police (wtf)
-Tadpole Gov vs UPM X Opp
-Lose.Major Bummer.Close with margin of 1 (overall is -1.5)

3rd Round

THW endorse the nuclear option in Malaysia
-Tadpole Opp vs USIM gov
-Win.Clear debate with margin of 2.Overall margin (+0.5)

Day 4 (Saturday)

-The word 'MindFuck' was coined by Mr.Osho and accepted in Tadpoles daily conversation.Hillary and Joshua remains pure. the word simply means the expression you show on your face when you are thinking of something really odd.Usually followed by 'Brain Orgasm' which is the burst of energy when you figure it out.

4th round

THW prosecute Executive Board Members of Oil Companies for Enviromental Pollution
-Tadpole Opp vs Uitm Sarawak Gov
-Clear win.

5th Round

THW allow airlines to charge passengers based on their weight and luggage
-Tadpole Gov vs Swing team
-Clear win

The 5th round was a silent round and was announced at a dinner at 11 pm
Tadpole broke into Quarter finals as the 6th team, the team with the highest score based on 3 wins.Awesome.

Day 5 (Sunday)

Every facial expression is considered to be 'mindfuck'. Hillary is partly corrupted due to the lack of clean food tampered his ability to decide the between good and bad. Raihan shows simptoms of sickness due to lack of food as well (more of a choice not to eat) .

Quarter-finals

THW not protect Greece's Economy
-Tadpole Oppo vs UT Mara 2 Gov
-Too complicated to be understood in laymen terms.6 people contradicting each other.HAHA
-Kalah.Major Bummer.

Losing the Quarter finals left the entire team in a daze.Joshua and Hillary offered themselves to be adjudicators for Public Speaking. Meanwhile, Osho, me and Raihan went on a fascinating journey of self actualization. We were walking randomly around the Uitm campus and Osho seems to be in a trance while listening to his collection of metal songs.Raihan and me take turns shouting insults for fun due to his inability to hear us. Both of us decided to keep walking untill we decided to go out of Uitm.

Along the way, an interview with an ostrich occurs. (=_=)




Afterwards, the pointless march goes on..And we reached the other gate of uitm arau.Compared to the first one, this was even more situated in the countryside. I had this feeling that a cab will pass soon in 5 minutes.Osho being realistic and possibly heartbroken, told us to patah balek and tido.Just as he finished the last sentence, a cab passed.Wow.So ktorang pon ke bandar Kangar balek untuk makan2.In the quest of Perlis Perspective, we walked to find a unique food in Kangar.Refusing to go to mamak stall as it is probably the 2nd most common thing in KL other than traffic lights, we press on.Ironically, last2 makan gak kat KFC.Haha.Our transport to Kangar the next day was the pakcik teksi who gave us his number. Life is indeed totally random.

Day 6. Monday (Back to reality yo)

Alas all the best things have to end.and on Monday, it kinda does.So awal pagi,(by some unknown forces,sumer bangun awal)

Rushing sbb nak kejar bas pukul 9.Next bus pukul 1.no way balek lambat. Apparently, the schedule state check out at 8.At 8.30, there was no one at the check out place.Guess we forgot to set our watch to Malaysian time.-_- At 8.50,after making some calls, we dropped our keys and caio. Sampai bus station, our beloved bus left. 'Fortunately' another bus was about to leave at 9.30.

The Dangers of Riding a Non Transnasional bus.

We got on a bus ** Express (the first two letters of the alphabet).

Yeah, right on schedule right.Wrong.The bus apparently took some untold detours with the most exceptional detail.Wow.Here are the stops

Kubang Pasu
Pukul 11-Driver bas lapar.G bandar situ cari kedai makan jap.God...

Sungai Petani
Pukul 1-Driver bas teringat yg die kena pos duit kat bini dia.Dapat epiphany masa bawak bas kot.bagus Suami mithali ni..Huhh

Alor Setar

Tak sure pukul brape, sbb x sure Sg Petani dulu ke stop ni dulu

Amek orang kat bus stop ni lak.Bas Multitasker en.. -_-

Ipoh
Pukul 3-Amek org lagi.Finally masuk gak Highway.Oh god...

dan beberapa stop lagi untuk qada hajat.Normal la.

Sampai KL.FINALLY

Pukul 7- Ktorang turun, bas terus jalan meneruskan ke JB lak.Hebat bas ni.Cat kuning atau hijau dah bole jadi teksi tros.

Pengalaman pertama menjadi mangsa teksi eksekutif.RM50 to KL Sentral.On the way, our teksi driver fought a passing car's driver when it was clearly his fault to switch lanes without signals.Normal common decency in KL.Great, we are home :D..Another cab from Sentral to Summit Subang Jaya (normal cab) RM24.Sampai pon umah.

Wow, now that is some random shit!

Overall.

Tadpole-3 wins,Broke 6, Points-1309, (2nd highest in the comp)
me- 375 points,rank 7. Just like Novice, i just need one more point to get a trophy. Sigh...
Joshua- Congrats for getting 2nd best overall dude!
Hillary Wee- Complete destruction of the mind.Mission Accomplished.

Tadpole, onwards to ICRC debate! But first, our Semester Exams! Cheerios

Saturday, March 6, 2010

Saturday Night Craze

10.30-11.00 malam (Casa Subang)


Haha..penat dowh main lari2 malam nih.Haha meh aku citer.Malam Sabtu tu, aku ngan din g makan kat bawah casa kat mamak nih. Makan2 n borak2 dah pukol 10.15 dah. Plannye sebenarnya nak swimming kat bawah lepas makan.

Malangnye pool sepatotnya tutup kol 10. Tapi ktorang cam nak mandi gak. So balek la tingkat 17 n tukar baju. Masa dalam lif tetiba terpikir lak bende jahat nih.

Aku : Panas dowh malam ni
Aiman: Ye ar, jom g swim
Din: Mandi2

Lupa lak tekan tingkat 1. Lif stop kat tingkat 9. Kebetulan dak2 pompuan Bank n Sime Darby ade kat floor 8.Unit facing each other. So hehe, ktorang pon sebulat suara nak g kaco2 jap. Men tekan loceng n lari2.Haha bodoh gle. Tekan la 3- 4 kali n 3-4 kali gak la dorang bukak pintu. Marah2 sebab xda org.. lawak dol.lari2 laju2 turun pakai tangga.

So back to swimming, g la tingkat 1. sekali xleh mandi, pak guard ada ngah halau org2.ADoi..
So on the way naek atas balek, ktorang pon cam x puas lagi kaco org nih. So ktorang cam buat kelainan sket

Aku: Plan baru jom
Aiman: Ha, aku tau, kte letak troli depan rumah n letak tuala kat troli tuh. Gerenti cuak nyer
Din : Haha..aku ngan dana tutop kepala ngan tuala n pakai gogel dok tepi umah
Aiman: Semart arh! Dorang Bukak pintu pastu korang takotkan..haha

SO ktorang letak ar troli n tekan loceng. dak Bank dulu la.. Dengar la dak pompuan gelak2 kat dalam umah. Terkejot dowh dorang ble nampak troli. Untuk tambah seram, Aiman gerakkan troli dari jaoh n aku ngan din buat suara hantu.Serius nampak cam gerak2 sendiri..

Azreen: Eh asal ader troli nih? ( Ngah jalan ke gril umah)
AKu ngan Din: Huahh!!!

Dorang jerit beb..hahaha..lawak maksima..haha..lari lagi.Penat gle.

Aiman: Weh2, dak Sime x buat lagi..Jom
Aku : Layan2

So ktorang pon setting prop kat depan umah Sime Darby.. Leh dgr la dak2 pompuan Bank yg dok sberang rumah dak Sime gelak2.haha. Skali masa tengah tekan loceng

Azreen: Weh! Tu bukan Umah Sime darby la, umah dorang kat sebelah, bukan seberang!
Aku : Ye ke? (terpinga2)

Bengong, Din ngn Aiman da lari dulu la.Ya allah, salah rumah la pulak.. :(

Pecut bai lari kat tangga depan lif.20 m.penat2. Skali aku nampak din datang balek kat umah yg salah tuh.Orang dalam rumah tu kuar n Din lari pecut. Cuak habis..Haha..lawak gle malam ni..Serius

Kudos to 'Pengacau2':

Aiman
Afiq
Din

Sory to :

Azreen
Sofea
Lydia
Amalina

Haha. Best night ever

P/S : Mana pernah buat bende2 nih kat SASER :D..

Friday, March 5, 2010

My new acer 5740G. I will be a better blogger i promise:

Thanks to

Bnm-4 paying it
Aiman- for recommending it
Din- for buying a vaio and let me compare it with aimans
Dad- 4 bringing me to lowyat
Shak- 4 teaching me how to update this techs stuff
Ian- teaching me how to download illegal shit at torrent
Afif- the great

Best gak maen game kat laptop ni :DD

Friday, February 12, 2010

Cuti2

Slamat Bercuti!

Ok2.

English,English,English please..

Wow, tak pernah dalam hidup aku, aku bercakap bi hari demi hari demi hari..

Penat kot. Shit
.

Bile kaki melangkah je kat kolej, bahasa melayu cam dah hilang dan digantikan dengan english. Rase cam duduk kat overseas lak. Kta masuk tempat orang en, layan je la

"Hello, Good Morning" menggantikan Assalamualaikum, selamat pagi

Sampai satu ketika rase rimas nak bercakap, masuk kelas, sumer perbincangan dalam bahasa inggeris.Ble mood nak bercakap kadang2 kte terstutter, salah cakap, orang x paham. Tapi at the end of the day, memang berbaloi. Thank you, all my english teachers, kalo korang xde, memang terdiam la aku. hehe..

Ngah kat dalam Taylor's tu sempat la aku berjumpe seniors2 yg make an 'impact' in my junior life.hehe

ade la:

Jambu Jebat
Efi Eksplorasi
Amir Safwan Kasturi
Aiman
Amir (x tau nama pnoh)

n len2 yg x ingat nama.Sori byk2

Agak akward jumpe dorang balek, n teringat masa last day f4 masa ari cakap n dajal f5 masa 2. Kalo ikutkan hati memang nak buat tapi nasib baek la baek masa 2. tak buat.last2 nmpk dorang kat cni.life has a way to get u back in the ass i think. :D Tapi xde la rase cam dorg senior ke ape en, so kawan cam biasa r.

So a bit about a levels:

My course is Law
Hopefully bound to Uk
1 thn setengah
Bapak banyak kena belajar
Cikgu sumer best2
Habis blaja kena kerja 10 tahun ngan Bank Negara Malaysia

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Aik? Habis dah Cuti aku??

Masa Untuk Belaja Balek!! :D


p/s: Esok ade kelas, kena tido awal! :D